Sunday, August 17, 2008

Thought Tank

Salutations from the mind of Major Bubbles. It would seem that brilliance is not as hard to come by as would be imagined, or at very least that good ideas for very random and interesting blogs are not hard to come by. It's getting them to stay that is the problem. Perhaps I (being the mind and power behind this very blog) should take the time to consciously write down ideas, therefore assuring that those ideas stay concretely in the conscious world.

You see, I as a brain have a problem that is very difficult to overcome. I process more information, more electrons that fire, and more unknown stuff than any one computer, or probably any current string of computers does. I'm not sure (seeing as my carrier has not taken the time to present the knowledge to my connection to the outside world, the senses) whether this is the truth, but as a mind I'm allowed to be as vain as I want, as long as my carrier is good at repressing or at least masking that vanity in a more socially acceptable atmosphere.

Still, I have a problem. I've taken control, for the moment, or my carrier, to make sure that everyone may know that it's not HIS fault that there are long lapses in interesting and rather unique blogs, but rather that it is MY fault. Major Bubbles' Brain. If you want to, you may call me Charles. I will know explain the problem that I have is wont to make it difficult for the Major to display the normal brilliance that I am the author of but he gets all the credit for.

My thought tank has a hole in it. This is no laughing matter, I assure you. Other people have referred to this same problem as attention deficit disorder (and done so mostly in jest, though I'm told it's really quite a serious issue). Every brain, or I at least, takes a moment while it's still in the development stage to order a thought tank, a great big vat where all the information can be stored, either to be swirled together or kept separated by tiny vials of precious information. I can't tell you what a mess it makes when information that is supposed to be kept separate from the rest of the soup is smashed open and mixed with all the rest. I understand that happened to Albert Einstein's brain once and the result where some rather controversial theories that threw everyone into a stew. I digress.

My point is, my thought tank has a leak. I've been coming up with new and brilliant ideas to put into the mix, and so I store them in the tank, only to come back five minutes later to discover that my precious thoughts have all leaked out onto the floor! It makes a terrible mess, and as any brain knows, the more thoughts get lost, the more the carrier has to blow his or her nose to get rid of all the congested thoughts that end up pooling there. (That's what nasal congestion is, didn't you know?)

The effects of a leaky thought tank are disastrous. Not only does it lead to a congested respiratory device, it also leads to short attention spans and very short term memory. When I say short, I mean the shelf or tank life of a thought is about four minutes. The carrier of the brain (as is the current case with mine) then exhibits attitudes that other carriers associate with mental instability. Talking of random things, thinking that things are happening that aren't (that's some of the thought that ends up stuck in the tank), and the such.

So please, if you see my carrier blowing his nose consistently, or even if you notice a slightly maniacal tendency with him, be considerate and forgiving. He's trying to deal with leaky thought tank.

3 comments:

Annie said...

You know, they have medication for that. I could hook you up...you'd have to see a doctor first, but still. Also, in my pharmaceutical studies, I came upon a website that might help you with your "congested thoughts". http://powerpak.com/index.asp?show=lesson&page=courses/105662/lesson.htm&lsn_id=105662 Enjoy!

Anonymous said...

Thought tank is an interesting metaphor. So, what would happen to you if your thought tank started to fill so much that it began overflowing. Mine starts coming out my mouth. Which, in my case, could be great or it could lead to my downfall. But, I have learned over many hard years of mistakes that everyone is human and just because they start spouting poetry or do some random act of wierdness doesn't mean that they are like that all the time. You may have moments when you can't concentrate for all the chaos going on upstairs. But don't base your entire rest of your life on those moments. Life is about growing and changing and learning and becoming more and more real. I think that those people who just sit around and watch tv are not as real as they could be. Get out and live and the more you live the easier it will be to overcome those moments when you think that you will never make it through a spasm of ADHD or if you had a fabulous thought and you lost it. Also, it helps to be able to move on and not dwell on past blunders. Occasionally, I have become so bogged down with the bottomless pit of despair because of something I had thought of or something that had happened that I just knew that I would never get out. Then I look back a week or two later and can't even remember what had happened or it really doesn't matter all that much any more. Although there are some things that have happened that have taken me a few years to get over, I am so much more a new person once I have lived some more and moved on, not becoming chained to the past, but living in the moment and planning for the future. By the way, I too have the eternal faucet nose syndrome, so I never go anywhere without a packet of pocket sized tissues just in case.

Katie said...

Writing things down is very helpful. That's why I always have a little notebook with me. It fits in my purse of my pocket (it's obviously in my purse, because it's just so unsightly if I have to put it in my pocket) and whenever I get random ideas, I can scribble them down. Also, as an added bonus, I tend to scribble cryptically. So not many people could decipher my notes to myself. (Except for my grocery lists. Those are pretty self-explanatory.)

I must be leaking quite badly today. And I thought I just had allergies ;) On the bright side, if you're only losing new and brilliant ideas, you're still retaining quite a lot of information.

(Unlike other silly people I know who can't make connections very quickly . . .)