Monday, April 27, 2009

The First Last

This blog is meant as an addendum. An addendum to a very blessed year.

Perhaps you think me a bit religious for stating it that way. The truth is that I'm a lot religious, and possibly even more so then before, which means that it will most likely be leaking out in what I say. I hope, however, that I will continue to tickle neurons in a pleasing manner, and not go about beating them with yea verily's. Yea. And verily.

Anyway, yes, it is a post script, an ipso facto, a post mortem, an after death, and a lot of other things that I can't recall nor would you really be that interested if I could. I'm normally the type to celebrate the end of something. Partly because it signifies a relaxing of sorts-the end of the day brings the sweet release that is sleep (to sleep, perchance to dream. . .of that one girl I saw today. . .Okay, so Shakespeare didn't actually right the last part, but we all know that he was thinking it, or something close unto it), the end of a semester means lots of parties and more time, the end of a week brings a time for resting, the end of a job normally brings new and exciting opportunities, the end is almost always accompanied by something even better, something new and fresh. Something that is to be celebrated.

This year is most definitely a year that has many things coming after. I can only recall once in my life when I have ever wished myself back at the beginning of a stage-and that had more to do with what I hadn't done during my time then what I had. I find myself, now, in the interesting position of wishing that I had more time, just as I am.

It's hard to say exactly why I feel this way. There are friends around, and while it may be true that the amount of association will decrease their friendship most certainly will not. There are positions that have ended that ought to feel more of a relief than a sadness. There are responsibilities that are no longer mine that I ought to be glad to see go. There is a period of indecisiveness and lack of direction that is drawing swiftly to its end that I should be cheering out with the greatest enthusiasm.

And yet, past all of the reasons why I should be glad to welcome the next moment in, I'm given pause here at the end of this one. It's been a time of happiness, a time of friendship. This time has been among if not the best time of my life. I am hesitant to let it leave me.

Funny thing, though, it will whether I let it or not. The only question is, will I end up sitting around complaining that I missed my taxi, or will I go ahead and hop on the next one that comes along? Yeah, I think I'd like to get wherever it is that I'm going. I guess I can just be glad that there's always something better on its way.

So look out Major, here comes the world.

2 comments:

Katie said...

Actually, Shakespeare was talking about death with the whole "to sleep, perchance to dream." It's from Hamlet's "To be or not be"... in which he contemplates killing himself... so yeah, the "sleep" would refer to death. And if you read further, he realizes he doesn't know "what dreams may come"...so he doesn't kill himself.

And in case you were wondering whether or not I happen to be an English nerd... :)

Annie said...

When the world comes, it comes fast and hard. I'm sure this last year was full of memorable experiences. I don't mean to sound like a killjoy, but I do have to say that association with friends decreases significantly and unfortunately so does their friendship. So be prepared. I can't even begin to explain how disappointing it was having "old and dear friends" be so aloof; treating me like an acquaintance, if that. That was when I truly felt life move on. Since you're "yellow", I'm sure you'll take everything with a positive attitude...so good luck!