A small (not short) story

Hello blogger friends! I admit with frankness, I'm not blogging very much, though the reason is an understandable one. Between the life of a working full time student who also is involved with both a choir and a play, I'm a little sandwiched at the moment, and find little time for much other than taking care of the various things I've already committed myself too. Still, I found time today for a little bit of blogging fun.

I just barely started an introduction to fiction class. One of the first things that the book of that class mentions is the ending of books, about how some books are written merely for the purpose of enjoyment, while others accomplish that while still portraying a message. I decided to try my hand at a short story today. You can pick it apart as you wish (and in fact I'd be delighted if you did). So I hope you enjoy this small story.

Crossing Point
By Major Bubbles.

"The middle ground is always the worst," he thought, as he cautiously approached the opening of his cave. His heart began to race as the cold air that always mingles on the edge of the cave encroached his lungs, stinging his throat all the way down. He shivered as he got closer to the edge, the white, dead light from the world outside now beginning to overwhelm the warm and friendly yellow glow from inside his cove.

"Could something be waiting for him, just outside?" he wondered, his mouth dry and his breathing shallow. Wishing there was another way, he slowly poked his head around the corner, his heart beating so fiercely that he felt it pounding in his head. Trying with futility to quiet both breathing and heart, he stuck his head a little further out. Now, at this moment, when he couldn't quite see around the corner, but someone could probably see the top of his head, was the moment of greatest alarm. Trying to swallow his dry tongue, he pushed out far enough to see around the corner. A sharp intake of breath and. . .

Nothing. Even though it meant temporary safety, all his nerves were tensed, every muscle ready, knowing that any moment the clear horizon could be smudged by a hostile observer. Wishing for extra eyes, and trying to see everywhere at once, he crept further out into the cold, hard light. He felt exposed, cold, and vulnerable. Thank goodness the distance to travel across the middle ground was not long.

He made his way across, coming to the place just around the corner of safety, of another secluded spot. Clutching his only protection close against his skin, he sidled around the corner, wary of anything moving. Suddenly, there was a sound! The soft padding of something moving, quietly, slowly behind him. His heart began to race, the adrenaline in his body surging as he considered what to do. Fight? No, he was much to vulnerable and exposed. Flight was the only option. The quiet movement behind him echoed in his ears, pushing his heart to greater limits. Blood rushing to his head, he fled.

"A few steps more, I mustn't be seen!" he plead to whoever listens to human thoughts. "Let me not be seen!"

The soft footfalls behind drove him on. One step. Two. The sound grew greater, perhaps more because of his fright than actual fact.

He practically flew into his safety, into seclusion from watching eyes, pausing only to shut the way behind him. Flicking on the lights, he breathed a sigh of relief, comforted by the warm yellow glow of familiar lights.

"That's the last time I forget to take my towel with me to the shower," he sighed, beginning to towel off.


I had a lot of fun writing this, and I hope that it was enjoyable. Feel free to pick it apart, I'm kind of hoping you do.