A Question Answered

I admit it; I am selfishly satisfied at the amount of replies which I received. I think my favorite reply to my question of why girls date jerks would have to be the reply sent by my friend WM-Star, who simply put it "jerks are hot." While I personally do not agree with this statement, I think it leads quite nicely into my personal explanation of why guys date brainless girls. I here thank Devastator for adding a more complete complexity to the answer, and I also thank every single last one of you for the answers you provided. Maybe I'll ask a compelling question on every blog, just so I can get so many comments.

I heard once that blue and green are the most aesthetically pleasing colors to the human eye. I heard various opinions as to why, such as the prevalence of those two colors, but my personal opinion is because they're both just plain beautiful. God knew that we as humans would like those colors, so he made the sky blue, the sea a blue-green, and the mountainside and rolling hills a beautiful and luscious green. At least, that’s true if you live in the east. It was made that way so we could enjoy it. I'm afraid that men indeed were created so as to be attracted to beautiful women, and especially women who pay minute detail to their bodies and the portrayal of them. It's a truth that at one point in time all men have to come to grips with. They just like beauty. So, it is that we come to the male version of what WM-Star commented, and even Devastator commented. "Girls who aren't so academically inclined focus more on appearance, making them more attractive.” is what was said specifically and "jerks are hot" could then translate into "less academically inclined girls are hot." I for one do not agree, but the point has been made by others, and so it must appear here. The hormonal imbalance so common to men is a driving force that causes even normally coherent males to the dating of silly members of the opposite sex. This is only one point, and in my mind is all too often left as the only point as to why men date silly people. Because, after all, in the movie Emma the character of Mr. Knightly is quoted as having said "Men of character, no matter what you may say, do not want silly wives!" It's a little bit of an extrapolation to take dating to matrimony, but it's basically the same principle. So, what character is it that drives men to date silly women? Is it solely because of hormones, a lack of sense in the face of beauty? You might say that such is the case, but I plan to show that it is not solely hormones that drive men to silliness, but something much more deep.

Men are males. Yes, I know this is an obvious statement, but look for a moment at what it implies. Males have been known to always try and show off how very manly they are. Bucks and many other animals head butt each other repeatedly to see who bows out first. Men get into boxing matches and play sports. Most male animals do not have one partner for life, and lamentably the idea of having lots of women is a sign of masculinity (deplorable, but the truth in the world. Not the real truth, but it is the image of the world). Men go to great lengths to show how much of a male they really are, even doing such things as eating sardines out of a can. Pretty gross, but they do it. Why? Because men are males, and males have insecurities. Big ones. The type that makes them act like suicidal maniacs, to show themselves as much as to others that they are not afraid, and that they will not be beaten. Insecurity is a hard thing to overcome, and only those "men of character" can truly overcome it. Insecurity, then, is the reason I name as why men date silly women.

This insecurity comes in different stages, or shows itself in different ways. One of the biggest is the "what if" insecurity. What if it works out, and becomes something serious? Perhaps deep down inside a man rings out the "what if this gets serious?" question, a frightening prospect at best. The average college kid has no means of supporting two people, is not emotionally prepared for such an adventure, and the idea of such a commitment is daunting. Thus, they date people that they know they would never actually marry, such as girls who are going on missions. I find it interesting that right before someone leaves on their mission, they suddenly become very desirable. It's either because they are no longer available, or because they no longer pose a threat to a peaceful, contentedly single mind. Or perhaps the men who are close suddenly realized what a good thing they were going to be missing out on. Either way, men date people they know will not pose a "what if" question: the silly ones. Perhaps the insecurity of lack of preparation pushes men to date silly girls.

There's more to it, though. Sensible guys look good and feel good when they are with silly girls. Why? Silly girls laugh at everything, think you're absolutely brilliant even if you're not, will smile at any activity, will not complain ever, and will not make you think. When a guy goes on a date with a silly girl, he suddenly becomes alpha prime. He's with a beautiful girl, she thinks he's funny and smart, and doesn't even mind telling him so. The insecurities are gone, and the ego of said male will grow and grow. I don't know anyone who doesn't like to feel like Alpha Prime, and a good way to feel that way is go with someone who will think you're amazing no matter what. I don't mean to demean in anyway the admiration that is felt toward someone when you truly do love them, but this silly over-the-topness is definitely something that boosts self esteem. Guys like that. It decreases their faults by comparison, and it also helps them set aside other concerns, like there concern that driving girls all around in contributing to harmful gasses that expand the hole in the ozone layer. Those types of concerns are enough to give anyone a pimple attack.

This silly attitude of laughing at everything and finding everything good about someone is a type of flirting. At least, that's how most guys interpret it. By nature no one does not like to be rejected, and the same holds true for guys. It may even be truer. This idea that you're important enough to be found and accepted is something that runs all the way back to when as children we would play hide and go seek. It's great to be the first one found, to run back and have someone chase after you. But what if no one chased, because you weren't worth the effort? Thinking that guys don't fall pray to these kind of insecurities is to think a lie. Guys like to be chased after as well, or at least accepted and allowed to chase. The idea of guys and girls chasing after each other is the fundamental of both hide and go seek and dating, meaning that both can be fun at any age. Except that dating is a little inappropriate for little people. Seriously. The point is that guys learn from a very early age that they are supposed to chase after girls, and it's a lot more fun if they're allowed to do so. Silly girls are flirty, according to the popular stereotype. This provides and excellent target for men to chase. A target that they are sure will enjoy the hunt. Insecurities about whether or not a girl will accept to be sought after are hard to overcome, and I fear in many cases lead to men dating rather silly women.

I hope I have not been too harsh on either of the genders in what I say. I realize that I may be putting too much emphasis on the role that insecurity plays in this dating anomaly, and I am positive that there is a much truer and complex answer out there, but at least that provides some sort of explanation. In defense of my gender in general, I know many men who do not date silly women for the fact that they are silly. I know many men of character who recognize that they are not sure about everything, that they do have insecurities, but they do not let them bother their actions. I salute those men, and also the women of character who do not date jerks because they know that they are better. I admire both genders for their various and diverse strengths.

And so it is, a questioned is answered.